That Woman hasn't posted photos nor done much else.  She's sat around whining about work and the non-internet connection that the humans have at home.  Its made posting near impossible she says.   The Cat thinks she's lazy.

============
The Woman says:

The Shedding is upon us.

As you all know, The Cat is originally from Down South, where there are really only two seasons:  The Cold Season and The Time of Unbearable Heat.  The mini-seasons, Spring and Fall, last for about a week or less, during which The Cat usually replaces his fur coat with a softer or thicker pelt as required.  He is a creature of habit and environment.

So The Cat decided that it must be Spring about mid-February and proceeded to start shedding his thick winter coat.  Fair enough, thought The Woman.  She can surely endure a week of cat-shedding.  

"Alergies be damned," she wheezed.  Such is the sinister, seductive nature of cats, that all manner of discomforts can be endured for the pleasure of being owned by these fine, noble creatures.   

So The Shedding began.  Small kittens began to form in the corner of every room.  The Giant swept the silent balls of fur away before their legs formed and they started to run.  After two weeks The Cat realized that it might be Spring in Kentucky, but by gods, it wasn't spring in Canada.  It was COLD.  He needed more fur.  The Winter pelt started growing back, coarser and deeper than ever before.   

Some time in early March The Cat said: "SPRING!  The Snow has melted!  Time to replace all the hair on my body!  This time, I'm serious!"

For the next two weeks everytime The Cat moved clouds of fur followed him.  Do you remember the character Pigpen in the Charlie Brown Cartoons?  He was based on The Cat.*   There was a veritable whirlwind of hair surrounded his every leap.  When he walked around corners The Hair followed him like a herd of paparazzi.   If you listened carefully you could hear it.

The Giant vaccumed day and night.  It was the only way he could stop the Hair Kittens from growing legs**.  The entire house vibrated with the constant sound of his efforts.   By mid-March, The Cat had replaced all the hairs on his body twice.  No kittens were found and The Woman gave a sigh of relief.

Spring slowly dragged it's body into the northern climes.  We had sunny, warmish days.  The first few insects buzzed around.  The Cat was allowed out onto the deck where stretched and sniffed and declared that yes, his new spring coat of soft and delicate fur would do just fine.

The Woman, finally able to breathe, wiped tears from her eyes.  Finally, she thought, it is over.

Last night though, The Woman went to pet The Cat.  The soft, delicate fur flew up, an effluvial event of epic proportions.  Thick, heavy fur began to form immediately, sprouting with incredible speed.  It was almost like watching Genisis.

The Woman choked and sputtered, barely able to breathe through all the flying fur.  Hair Kittens scattered for the darkest corners.

"Cat?!  What is going on?"  

The Cat said nothing but showed her his bum.  Then he ran and ran, galloping through the house, tearing up and down the stairs.  The Hair followed.

This morning The Woman woke up and looked outside.  

There was snow on the ground.  Yes, snow.  In April.  This is Canada, eh?   

It was cold and dark and filled her heart with fear.  

"Cat?" she cried out in a thin voice.  "Caaaat?"

The Cat was no where to be seen but something stirred in the corners, slowly tottering on delicate, half-formed legs.



===============
* little known Cat Fact #1:  cats  travel in time.  The Cat Says, "The Tardis is for wimps."  Where do you think we go when we aren't around the house?  Visiting the Queen?  Why do you think there are so many of us? 

** little understood Cat Fact #2: "you can fix a cat, but you can't really Fix a cat".  Cats, if spayed or neutered, can still reproduce asexually.   When clumps of cat hair reach critical mass they begin to form legs.  The legs always grow first, allowing the Hair Kitten to better hide itself in corners, under beds, behind the toilet, etc.  Once the legs form the stomach forms right before the brains - which when you think about it explains a lot. 

Wet Cat Food Recall
"An unknown number of cats and dogs suffered kidney failure and about 10 died after eating the affected pet food"

You all probably heard about this already BUT just in case you feed your cat or dog *ANY* of the following pet foods, you should really check.  This applies to Canadians as well.

A list of brands can be found here
but some of them are:  Iams, Best Choice, Nutro, Loving Meals, Presidents Choice, Special Kitty, some Science Diet, Ekanuba, Total Pet etc.  These aren't just the cans either - some of the list includes pouches.  (especially the Presidents Choice brand - sold here in Canada).

just some of the stores that carry the brands are: Kmart, Kroger, Walmart, PetsMart.  If you've bought any of the wet food listed at the above links call 1-866-895-2708 for more information.

Better safe than sorry.

Sorry for the incredibly long delay between posts.    The Woman says: "problems with Internet at home" and "Work insanity".  She mumbles something about headaches, lack of sleep, Sick Giant, stress, stress, some more stress etc.  She will get cracking next week!  Promise! (or just cracked).

The Cat Says:  No Damn Excuses!  Forget about Work!  Why aren't you petting The Cat??
========================================================================

Guest Cat #15, Sian, shows off some of her many talents in this photo.   She's also quite a traveller.  She was born in Toronto, but is currently living in New York City with rackle.  The Woman has known Sian since she was a wee kitten... in fact Sian was the first kitten The Woman ever saw.  

The Woman worked with Rackle and TT many years ago... well. 7yrs or so.  And one night TT found Momcat out in the cold and rescued her.  Turns out Momcat was about to be a Mom.  Momcat had  emergency surgery days after the kittens were born, so Sian and her three brothers were all hand-reared by TT, Rackle and other volunteers.  The night before Sian was born, Rackle dreamt of a black kitten - and when Sian was born she was so dark she looked black.   It was just meant to be.

                


Sian, btw, was almost named Grep*.   But when she was about 5wks old she was sleeping on Rackle's leg and woke up.  She looked up into Rackle's eyes and Rackle says, "I heard a silent chorus of (about six) voices all saying "Sian, Sian, Sian, Sian..." in my head."  So Sian it was.  

*the woman says: 
she thinks Zcat would have been good too (and of course thinks: Zed-Cat)

In yesterday's post (The Woman is Still Hypnotized!  Loves that photo) there was a comment that was made regarding where Marcy and Loki came from.  This set The Woman to thinking, and wondering and thinking some more. 

Here's a little quiz for you all.  Its short, because we are all busy - no doubt chasing cats, thinking about cats, dreaming of what the little furry maniacs are planning next. 

The Cat's Quiz!

1. How many cats in your house?
2. Where did you get your cat? Was it a shelter, pet shop, present on the porch?  Did it come attached to a spouse?
3. What do you consider your cat's quirkiest habit?
4. How did your cats end up with their human names?  

that's all.  Its a good way to get to know you all.

Regards,
The Cat.

The very kind hunnyfreakhas shared this award-winning photo.  Of course Marcy is just so beautiful that almost any photo with her in it is bound to win some prize.  She will hypnotize you if you don't believe it too!   is owned by Marcy and Loki - who were both adopted from: The Edmonton Humane Society as adult cats.   The Cat thinks this was an excellent idea!  hurray for adopting!  Yay for adult cats!


































Hunnyfreak says:
Marcy is a dog in a cat suit! She is the good will ambassador to all that enter the home, insisting on saying hi and demanding a quick pet from all. The Panago Pizza guy always scritches under her chin and Marcy gives him a little kisses. To say she is a cuddler is a massive understatement! At night she will cuddle up to the girl and is cuddled like a teddy bear, much to the dislike of the boy.  She plays well and tolerates a lot from The Niece and has yet to growl or scratch her even though the wee one has been known to pet hard or tug at her tail. When the Niece is sleeping, Marcy will always curl up at her feet and watch over her.

 

Marcy is a tubby 12 pounds and she is as lazy as she is cute! We don’t call her ‘fat’ we say she is ‘abundant’. When The Girl has a migraine, Marcy will sit on her head and purr to make her human feel better, and it is greatly appreciated!

The Cat also thinks it is a good thing to sit on people's heads.  Especially people with migraines! 

The Cat Says:  what's this Vday?  If The Giant or The Woman kiss me one more time......






  













































Awwwww... but he's so cute!

Happy Valentine's Day.   Go kiss your kitties. ;)

The Woman first wants to thank you all for responding to The Drama of Henry.    She's finally well enough to stop sneezing and start posting. 

We now return you to our Irregularly Scheduled Cat Photos!

Pooka owns cinnabari  and nous_athanatos.    Obviously owns them.  
He's a graceful 12lbs of sheer muscle, a Big Black Cat who reminds everyone how lucky they are to be owned by such a large, and toothy specimen of cathood.   Here's what cinnabari  had to say  about this photo:





Pooka is forever asking to have water from the bathtub tap. Never
sinks. Only the tub. To achieve this goal, he will:

- lurk outside the bathroom when people shower and attempt to trip  them when they come out.
- sit in the MIDDLE of the floor and yell at the top of his lungs until someone looks at him, at which point he will run and jump into
the bathtub.
- lie in wait for people who might happen to walk past the bathroom.  He does this by huddling up in a dark, invisible ball, exactly where
people might walk if they're going through the hall with the lights  off.  When the inevitable collision occurs, he takes advantage of Shouting 

Human to rush into the bathtub and yell for compensatory tap water.

He usually gets his way, but never before having to ask.
(And yes, he has a perfectly full bowl of water.)






The Cat Says:
Yell LOUDER Pooka!  Don't forget, the people in the parking lot need to know how badly you need water!


and oh, btw, The Woman has put up a photo of The Cat here
along with other photos of hers.  The other photos don't matter because there are no cats involved.

==============
BTW - The Woman meant to ask... anyone else's cats do something similar?  The Cat used to love to drink out of the faucet back in Kentucky.  
Unfortunately Toronto tap water just isn't good enough for him now.

As The Woman is home sick she feels *now* is the time to talk about Henry.

Poor Henry wasn't very happy.  Every night he cried and cried .. "Maaaaaaaauve!"  "Mauuuuuve!"  "Maooouve!".  Mom stayed up and tried reading to him, but as soon as she was in bed he would cry from his little space under the sofa-chair.  

Then he stopped eating.  No crunchy food.  No.  No stinky food either.  Mom got worried.   She enticed him to eat a mouthful .. and then he'd just refuse.  As soon as it got quiet the mauving began:
"Maaaaaaaauve!"  "Mauuuuuve!"

We talked to Mom.  The good people at PAWS Toronto talked to her and The Woman.  Henry would be fine for a while and then just be miserable at night.  Mom played a radio.  Still .. Henry was LOUD... (we could hear him down the hall and through a closed door)...
and then the neighbours logged a complaint about noise.   "The Maaaaaaaauving," they said. "Must stop!"

Finally Henry upped his hunger strike.  He also stopped drinking water.   At that point it was looking quite drastic.   

Henry went back to the kind people at PAWS Toronto.  Evidently they think he had bonded to another cat (or two) that he was rescued with -  and by the sounds he was in mourning.  Poor Henry.   He's VERY Happy now though - and it looks like he won't be adopted out solo again.  Seems like he bonded.

Poor Mom's traumatized by the cat experience...  and she said she's not going to think of the word CAT for a loooong time.  

The Woman is just very sad.  At least though, Henry is happy.. and really that's what's important. 


  

Henry arrived today!
The humans went out today and spend the morning slogging through the cold and slushy streets of Toronto to search out some of the needed cat items.  Strange enough the local pet store close to Mom's had no scratching posts.  Nor did the second shop.  The people then had to make a long trip to a Pet Smart on Eglington where they found many of the things Henry needed.

The lady from PAWS Toronto brought Henry who was meowing very unhappily, and loudly, along the way.  She brought in Henry in his little carrier and The Giant let him out.  He slunk out... he's a long lean fellow... all legs and a long slick tail.  Mr. Long Legs.  He crept around the apartment - a small batchelor apartment where Mom lives - and stopped meowing within a few minutes of being free. 

He sniffed Mom and let her pet him which we took to be a good sign.  He checked out The Woman and The Giant... and slowly, cautiously made his way around the room.  There isn't a lot of furnishing, and only a closet, a small kitchen and the bathroom.  After about 30 minutes of giving the place a good sniff he disappeared.  

Just disappeared.  

The Paws lady departed, leaving the carrier, food and a wonderful big cat basket, and then the search for Henry began.  At first they weren't too worried.  
He had to be in the closet, right?  
But after some careful checking it became clear he wasn't there.  
And he wasn't in the kitchen, or bathroom.   And he wasn't in the sofa bed.  Hmf! 

Eventually he was discovered inside the Large padded chair.  Its a chair that evidently folds out .. and there was some catspace.  Just enough for a slick little guy to hide inside... with not even a whisker showing.

We opened his favorite Stinky Wet Food and he came out for some of that...  By the time the Humans started for home he was carefully creeping under the chair checking it all out.  Mom called later and said he's out and exploring.


anyway, prob more photos next weekend .. we'll kee an eye on Mom and Henry and check with them tomorrow.

Oliver owns xtastic
 xtastic had to use a special filter on her camera to get this photo because Oliver actually camouflages REALLY well against the couch.  She says: "So well does he match it that we have considered him lost when, in fact, he is sleeping there! He considers the couch in the photo HIS couch, and may God help any who tries to sit on it while he's there! "

Sometimes, when he is feeling very gracious he allow xtasic and her man to sit on the couch.   Maybe.  if they are REALLY good and bribe Oliver with his favorite toys: the lazer pointer, or crinkly shopping bags or jingly things (in that order of preference).   When Oliver isn't dominating the couch he loves sitting on the windowsill and luring birds.  Evidently he makes bird calls when he sees one.  A very Good Trick, thinks The Cat.  

He also loves testing his water dish - if the water isn't just perfect, he tips it right over, and makes the people fill it up again.  This sounds like one of those evil Tiger-cat tricks that was mentioned in a comment on the last post.

                                    

so.  Just another quick update.

An lj friend pointed us to a site that led to another site and then suddenly The Woman was looking here at HENRY
who seems to be very likely the cat of Mom's dreams.    He's been looking after the people at PAWS  - People Animal Welfare Society of Toronto.  The PAWS people have been very nice - and are even offering to bring Henry over to meet Mom on the weekend.  Henry has a bit of a tragic past.. but not so bad.  He still likes people.  And dogs, and other cats.  

Mom's quite exicted. Very excited.  Henry sounds like a good match.  Youngish enough to meet her Young Cat requirements... but not a Kitten.  Not a tiger cat either (tabby) since Moms not keen on Tabby cats (crazy!).  Handsome - at least in the photo.  He's had his shots, been fixed and all that jazz.   Black and white cat with a little black button nose.  How cute is that?  
The Cat says: very cute!

The woman at PAWS has even offered to bring Henry to mom's.  Now that is really very nice.  He'll be coming on Saturday to have his introduction.  The Woman is excited.  oh very very excited.  The Mom is excited.  Very Very.    Even The Giant seems very keen.  

The Woman has been impressed with the PAWS Toronto Adoption people.  They've been excellent at their customer service:  returning calls, discussing the various candidates....   They are really good with email.  This has been a very positive thing in the opinion of The Woman.  They are enthusiastic without being crazy... and we've spent a lot of time discussing various Cats.    The woman who runs PAWS has been very good.  She ranks HIGH in the customer Service sector as far as The Woman is concerned.  Clearly, cats are her big concern.  She spent a while discussing the various diets, histories, health and personalities.

So stay tuned.  A new cat is on the horizon.  More updates about Henry soon.  He'll be dropping by for a visit on Saturday.

Fluffy's on the roof working on your shingles.

Fluffy is a beautiful feral cat who owns the family of The Giant.  The Cat was born around those parts, but avoided the roof.  Not Fluffy!
Fluffy climbs up to the roof along with other cats and all hang out.  Mike Holmes  should really spend more time finding out the real cause of roofing problems.  Some people might blame racoons or squirrels...
but The Cat knows the Truth.
Now you do too.

                              

Quick!  update!

As the days go by it seems more and more likey Mom will be finding herself with A Cat.   The Woman has been in contact with various Animal Rescue shelters around town.  She seems quite determined to find Just The Right Cat for Mom.    Mom in the meantime has said she is no longer interested so much in Kittens (who might jump on her head) - but adult cats with nice personalities.

There are several candidates.  More info to come!

What would any site be without a Monty Python reference?  The skit of course starts out with a frightfully witty song.  

The Beast, who came by the name honestly, lives in the wildlands of Kentucky.  As The Woman has called it, "Kentucky, Land of Giants".  
The Beast  loves children.  Roasted. Stewed.  Even raw.  He will eat them for a snack, preferably at midnight.  The Beast owns "shadow walker" and SylverTabby (both of whom don't have LJ's but do read The Cat Says).

The Beast loves to eat SylverTabby's meatloaf.  After a few pounds of it he likes to digest before starting on breakfast.

                        

The wicked plan is in motion!

The Woman's mother called last night and announced she wanted:
 A Cat!
mwhahahaha!

The Woman began to tremble.  "Mom, you've never had a pet in your life!"
"Your father had a dog.*  You had birds.  I want a lovely SWEET Little Kitten."
"Do you know it will grow up and become Pure Evil?" The Woman said with in a shaking voice.  "It will become (deep breath!) A Cat!"
"Well, I raised you.  And I looked after The Cat before."  Dramatic pause.  "I want a Cat!"

You see, The Mother of The Woman is lonely.  She lives in a small apartment and paints beautiful landscapes.  She doesn't travel as much as she used to and she really likes The Cat.   She is set and determined to get A Kitten.   

The Woman called Mom today.  She barely slept a wink thinking all night about kittens and cats.  She listened to The Cat scamper down the hallways, scratch the old grey carpet, and crunch his food.  She imagined her mother sitting alone in her apartment through the long winter.  And then she thought of her mother petting The Cat.  The Cat liked Mom.  

The Woman stared out the window and wondered: Would her mother get bored by a cat? 
Never!   
Would her mother decide that a kitten Jumping on her head in the Middle of the Night wasn't Cute?  
perhaps after the 20th time the novelty might wear thin.
Would she then decide to give away A Cat because it was too much trouble?   
The possiblity is there... but on a good note it seems my cousin would be willing to take on any cat that my mother would decide is too much trouble.***

"Mom," said The Woman this morning.  "Are you still absolutely positive you want a Cat?"
"A *kitten*!  Or a Young Cat.  Nothing too old.  And not one of those tiger cats.**  A pretty cat.  And it's got to be healthy too."
"You know kittens are a lot of work.  They jump around a lot.  They will jump on your head.  They will gallop.  They will chew."
"Well, find me a lazy kitten."
"Hmmm," said The Woman.  "I don't believe they exist.  Perhaps one that is a bit older?  One that might have already been spayed."
"Oh. Hm.  Spayed."  Something Mom hadn't considered.   "Yes!  That could work.  As long as its pretty.  Not one of those Ugly Cats.  And i don't want a long haired cat either.  Nor one with a squishy face.  FIND ME A YOUNG CAT!"


so.  The Woman is contacting the Annex Cat Rescue  first and "feeling them out" about adoption of a single-youngish-not-ugly-non-squooshyfaced, short haired non-tabby LAZY Kitten. 


Let the Chaos BEGIN!

mwhahhaaaaaaa

The CAT!


------------------------------
The Woman gladly solicts any advice, suggestion etc on the above entry. 
-------------------------------
*more than 30 yrs ago.
** Tabby-cats, which for some reason, Mom thinks are More Evil than the Average Evil Cat.
*** by the sound of it, my cousin is looking for an excuse to get a cat, and even said she would help my mom, and that mom should find a youngish cat so that she can bring it to my cousins house to "meet the dogs". My cousin had a cat and 2 dogs back in Australia.. The Woman is wondering if this is some plot of The Cousin's to aquire a cat... but then my cousin is actually a cat lover... so she'd prob just be happy if everyone owned a cat.

The Woman, The Giant and The Cat would like to wish you all a Happy Holiday - or Holiday of Your Choice.  The Cat has received many Christmas Gifts from The Woman's mother.  Catnip packets, springy toys, fuzzy balls and Mice.  The Cat cares not for Christmas, but the treats are very good.    

The Cat loves getting stoned on catnip and biting the heads off mice for the holidays...  so may you all do the same!

                          

Now doesn't that sound like a tabloid headline?  vampire cat drains family...
One pint of blood!
Twooo!  Two pints of blood!